This is a great post by Michael Novak on married sexuality over at Patheos:
(1) Marriage is essentially a lifetime project that only begins on the wedding day. It takes two persons both committed to the hard work of making a marriage better month by month, over a full span of years. Marriage is something to be achieved, not simply given on day one.
(2) One of its great assists is a self-deprecating sense of humor on the part of each spouse, about the faults each has, and how neither one is god or goddess, but a faulty human being. Both need to be able to laugh at their own missteps and habitual faults. There are a lot of occasions to do so.
(3) Another is the daily habit of asking each other’s forgiveness, when hurts are given even unintentionally. Each human is so faulty. It is no disgrace to admit to insensitivities and outright wrongs, flarings of temper, cruel words, not paying attention, and many other wounds inflicted. It is a grace to be able to do so quickly. . . . Even though one sometimes has to be asking forgiveness for the same fault over and over, and it is not clear just how sincere such a repetitive apology can be, each must learn to voice it.
Read more: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/michaelnovak/2015/01/dear-bishop/#ixzz3PTQFelkw